…is Dr. Jennifer Kovach with her Vanilla Pepsi Punkcakes! Congratulations to you, Jenn! You’ve won, as promised, the one-of-a-kind autographed Bake and Destroy photo book, a set of classic wrestling-themed cupcake toppers and whatever other fun things I decide to mail you!
Now, before you all start booing and throwing your popcorn at me, I remind you that CM Punk himself judged this little bake-off. In fact, I have a statement from him about how he chose the winner:
Jenn wins!
It was tough…but I knew all along really. Its totally no fair but that’s life right? Jenn wasn’t the only one who capitalized on the fact that she knew who was judging the SugarSlam, but she did it the best. Sneaky. In a nut shell, Jenn is a heel.
Us born heels stick together. She somehow knew my hatred of frosting and used it against all of you. No faaaaair! But I love it. Fight dirty Dr. Jenn, fight dirty! As for the rest….man. Awesome stuff from everybody honestly. It would’ve been a different ballgame if I got to taste the entries. Maybe next time? Honorable mentions go out to the Flair cupcakes and Hitman cookies. Such rad creativity. Oh! And Bad News brownies……Jesus is that awesome.
Now, I must get back to not sleeping, working out too much and being champion of the world…
–Punk
And now for the winning recipe, as written by the SugarSlam champ:
- 2 cans of pepsi – reduced to one
- 1 1/4 cup flour
- 2 tbsp corn starch
- 3/4 tsp baking powder
- 1/2 tsp baking soda
- 1/3 cup oil
- 1 tsp vanilla
- 1/4 cup sugar
For the glaze… I was a slacker and didn’t measure anything. I put some powdered sugar in a bowl and added soy milk until it was thick and glazy. And I added some royal blue color color and a touch of vanilla.
Glob some glaze on. Add one championship belt.
Done.
In your face, directions! Who needs measuring and instructions anyway? How do you reduce two cans of Pepsi? Who fuckin’ knows? Either way she won and you didn’t!
I’ll also be mailing a little something out to the honorable mentions in Punk’s statement, but seriously- thank you to everyone who entered, this was so fun!
In totally unrelated news, I made Obama cupcake toppers tonight because I hate, hate, hate John McCain so here they are. Download the .pdf, print them on cardstock and campaign away! I also made some condom toppers I’ll be selling on Etsy, all proceeds will go to Planned Parenthood, which is in serious danger should Mumm-Ra the Ever-Living get elected.
Oh my god I almost fell off my chair laughing at ‘Mumm-Ra the Ever-Living’… thats awesome. I’m so downloading and using those Obama toppers.. and good for you for donating proceeds to Planned Parenthood. Thats a great idea.
hahahaha!!!! i hate that old asshole as well! Hey McCain! Way to use your prisoner of war status to get a sympathy vote out of the stupid wannabe patriots of this country! Maybe next time you could tell everyone your family was all killed during the 9/11 attacks. Jerk.
Congrats Jenn!
Yay, they’re vegan!
yeah, go Jenn! BIg congrats lady
what kind of person doesn’t like frosting? that boy needs therapy. ha ha.
yay team obama!
Thanks for the Obama cupcake toppers! I’m downloading and will make some soon!
Omg I am practically hyperventilating over here. CM Punk is a household word in my…household. Seriously he’s like my man’s other significant other. While we don’t do much corn syruped things these days I’ll have to break our HFCS edge just for these. And the teeny belt is killing me.